I'm not really "feelin' it" right now. What I am feeling is a little overwhelmed and kinda tubby to be honest. I'm really steering away from too much of the rah-rah, get in there and do it and beat myself up when I don't thing. It's just too easy of a pattern for me to fall into, and I've seen people actually do really well with a no excuses just do it thing, but it doesn't work for me. I get pumped up and drop lower than I was before when I crash. But I did make a commitment to be honest about where I'm at in my journey, and I believe that as my friends says, "naming it and claiming it" is sometimes all the solution necessary. So I'm feeling fat. I'm feeling disconnected. I'm feeling like I've changed my focus from a more Spirit-centered life to a task-centered life. I've found when my focus is more on my meditation and reading and service to others, everything else just gets easier and more tasks get done. But lately I've gotten into "grinding it out" and sure enough, stuff has became a grind, and then things have kind of ground to a halt. I'm not gonna abandon my mission or my goals, but I'll recognize that feeding my connection with to God, the rest will take care of itself.
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Not feeling it
I'm not really "feelin' it" right now. What I am feeling is a little overwhelmed and kinda tubby to be honest. I'm really steering away from too much of the rah-rah, get in there and do it and beat myself up when I don't thing. It's just too easy of a pattern for me to fall into, and I've seen people actually do really well with a no excuses just do it thing, but it doesn't work for me. I get pumped up and drop lower than I was before when I crash. But I did make a commitment to be honest about where I'm at in my journey, and I believe that as my friends says, "naming it and claiming it" is sometimes all the solution necessary. So I'm feeling fat. I'm feeling disconnected. I'm feeling like I've changed my focus from a more Spirit-centered life to a task-centered life. I've found when my focus is more on my meditation and reading and service to others, everything else just gets easier and more tasks get done. But lately I've gotten into "grinding it out" and sure enough, stuff has became a grind, and then things have kind of ground to a halt. I'm not gonna abandon my mission or my goals, but I'll recognize that feeding my connection with to God, the rest will take care of itself.
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5 comments:
Christy,
One thing I’ve learned is that when I lose my spiritual focus everything else starts to take a slow fade. I am just like you; my crashes get way worse each time. I’ve decided to take a step back and try and get my focus and priorities in order. I’m a little tired of all the rah-rah myself. Don’t get me wrong…rah-rah can be good for a season, but after a while it consumes too much of ones life, especially when one includes others in the hoopla, such as with the ‘whole blog thing, and ESPECIALLY if it’s focused on only one area of ones life.
I’m glad that you are not giving up on your challenge and goals. I am not either. I am even going to continue my blog, but on my terms, not with the mind set that if I miss a daily blog or workout I’m a failure. There seems to be an ‘elitist’ mind set with some people that are supposed to be part of a bigger picture and support group. I’m not going to set myself up for let down anymore, from them or myself.
It takes a special person, like you, who can admit where they are and their true feelings. I hope you never change and always be true to yourself as God leads.
Stay in touch
You are right, 'the rest will take care of itself'
Hi Christy,
What I want you to do is stay in there. Just don´t go very far away. These things happen to all of us, but just a bump in the road. Think of you and getting where you want to go. Take a breath, get back in the game, and know you´re certainly not alone. You´ve got me for sure!
Lynda
Christy,
You are so not alone...i know exactly how it is to come up short of the mark. I'm the queen of "oops! i did it again..."
Sometimes you just have to push the reset button. The beat yourself up part...? Well, that's something that your going to have to work through - NO ONE should feel that way. Just because you aren't there yet doesn't mean you won't get there.
As far as shredding goes: Look at your pic last year and look at your pic this year --no matter what, you've progressed! I am so happy for you in that regard! :)
You will only do that which is in your heart to do. That is verily the point of blogging - expressing and enjoying the journey to--well, wherever it is you're going!
Hang in there! (And keep on writing about how you feel - it's refreshing to see that there is more than just me out there feeling a little overwhelmed and understimulated.)
Best Wishes Girl!
all good comments from rob, lynda and c.k. I know what you mean. I always seem to get excited in the beginning and then seem to fade out near the end.(sometimes, in the middle). As to the "eliteness" thoughts...I don't think of myself as an elite "whatever". I just want to be fit and healthy and have used this blogging avenue as a means to assist me in getting there. It seems like that is all we think about because that is all we share in these blogs...but we are so much more than these blogs. this is just an avenue for the fit goal. You are so right in that when we lose sight of Christ and the meaning of our existence here on this earth we do "fall". We are here to glorify Jesus, not ourselves, eventhough that is what it seem like sometimes. what i do know is that if i hadn't continued my blogging of my weight loss journey i would have quit a long time ago! I do have other goals and dreams not related to fitness that bloggers don't know about, but that is not what my current blog is about.
ok, i've blabbed on long enough! How about this verse..."seek ye first the kingdom of God and all these things shall be added unto you" when our eyes are focused on Him, all else seems to fall into place.
Christy, listen to yourself and do what you know works for you and you will be fine. I'm with you on this one.
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