I am feeling stronger than ever. I worked so hard today. I feel great about that.I am eating, sleeping and breathing this mission, and I love that part, too.
But I'll be honest. Cartoons aside. Taking these photos lately is bringing me down and bumming me out. It has nothing to do with how I look or any of that. I think I look fine. I'm actually happy about that swimsuit.
I'm just having a lot of feelings. A LOT of feelings. I don't like tying myself to a result. I don't know that photos necessarily do that, but when I take them, I take them and think I want to see progress, where before, I was just happy doing the work.
Maybe one day the photos will be just a part of the process I enjoy. Just documenting the day. But it IS NOT like that right now. It is a roller coaster ride of feelings that plunges downward VERY fast.
Has anybody experienced this? Did you feel it change and mellow out? Were those feelings based on the fact that you saw progress and you got a high off of that or is it that you can snap the photos and feel good even if it doesn't show on that day or for SEVERAL days?
If so, how long did it take and how sensitive about your photos were you to begin with? I really want to know if anyone cares to comment.
I like being happy with the process. I know it may mean that I don't get results fast, but I kind of like enjoying where I am more than getting a result.
I like the idea of the next mission. But it is more responsibility than this mission.
I'M A SENSITIVE GIRL--VERY SENSITIVE. Read my blog. Lots of feelings, and I am gonna feel every one of them and am determined to never suppress another feeling again. However, knowing that, can I handle our next mission and enjoy it?
I like that idea that if we did another mission we would do it after November, because I can see how I will keep focusing on my health, which is VERY IMPORTANT thing for me.
I like keeping in touch with everybody, because I love you all and I don't want to let you go. So I'll just keeping peeking in your blogs through November.
Being a sort of team leader or whatever. I love reading people's blogs and seeing how great they are just as people, and then letting them know I see it. Because that easy and fun and it's been really easy and really fun in this group. BUT I have a very, "we don't want to be on her kickball team," old feeling regarding people being sort of in a group that I lead. lol
Mostly, I am very sensitive to pressure. These days, I like to run my own race, let myself be me, watch things unfold. This is new. Will the higher level of accountability and "positive pressure" feel just like plain old pressure to me?
Will I fall into my old way of thinking? More results. Less journey. Is that a bad thing? Have I fallen into the reverse of my other extreme thinking?
Many, many, thoughts. Many, many, feelings.
Today, I will just try to focus on this mission, each step, and enjoying it.
I'd love to hear what you guys think. Speaking of enjoying, I have blogs to read! Hey, I feel happy already!
10 comments:
I like your statement - you celebrate by doing extra reps!
Keep striving for great things. You CAN do it.
Bec
Hello Christy,
Through the years I tried dieting I noticed that results are not always the same between men and women. Our bodies' hormone levels and muscle development mark a difference in exercise payout. As I see the male pictures in RTP blog I notice faster improvements for them than us. However change it is still happening for us in small degrees where it matters the most; for example our organs, bones and mood. I am currently making a photo video with all the front pictures I have taken since I started 18 days ago and it would not be possible if I had not taken the pictures. Keep up the good work,
Miriam
Christy, listen to me alright. This 14 day mission mean nothing. No, I'm serious. When I first slimmed down, (and this is true) results only start to show after losing 5-6kg. And that is after maybe 4-5 months? Fat loss or weight loss is a slow and grueling process and if you think about it and expect to see results every, single day, you will drive yourself crazy and you will give up.
Enjoy eating healthy, enjoy feeling healthy and sooner or later maybe 3 months down hey, there is a difference! Frankly speaking, even bodybuilders who go for competition need 12 weeks to diet down. 12 weeks!
Just enjoy what you do. What this 14 day will do for you, and what these pictures will do for you, is just make sure you stay on track. Make sure you don't give up and keep going but there is no pressure, because life is not a race and this is definitely not a race.
I know it's hard NOT to expect results everyday, but that is the way things are, and that's why many people fail. Because they expect to see results everyday (including me). But we got to relax, work hard and enjoy the life and we will see it, notice it sooner than we think.
Sam
well, i thnk sam said it all, christy! i was going to think of aomething good to say but what he said captures it all. You have come so far! you are such a positive influence to us all with you grateful heart! You could lead any of us to a better understanding of what it means to transform your life, which is what this "mission" is all about! you have inspired us all to celebrate even the "small steps" we all need to take to succeed in fitness and in life. if we can't learn to celebrate those small victories how will we know how to celebrate the bigger ones?! you might not think of yourself as a leader in this physique transformation...but you already are!! you are leading the way!! don't doubt yourself...you can do this thing. find a positive affirmation you can say to yourself everyday...it has helped me...and in know it will help you and others to do the same. i truly believe we have to speak the good and positive things in our lives.
ok...you feel dumpy today...but tomorrow is a new day!!! love ya!
ok i was reading through you post again and wanted to comment on the picture thing you were talking about. in the beginning when i started losing weight (september 2006) i didn't take daily pictures like we are now. i took a picture with my cell phone in the beginning as i didn't have a digital at the time. and then one again a few months later. no granted, i did have a lot of weight to lose but yes i did feel a little sensitive in the beginning. i just didn't want to see myself like that...fat! it was grotesque to me. but i knew i would regret not taking one in case i did lose the weight. you see in the beginning i didn't actually believe i could actually lose weight as i hadn't done it for so long(12 years). but...just in case. and even now...i think, i am not even really changing all that much if at all. but i guess that is not the point of this exercise for now...the point is to hold ourselves accountable to someone so we will continue or start to do this thing called getting fit. seeing progress in my early pictures did help a lot but the change in my clothes and the comments i got from other people was enough to keep me motivated to continue on...everyone is different and will lose the fat at different intervals...not seeing a change in the pics does not mean your body is not changing. you also have to look at your energy level with just eating the right foods. well, i think i have just rambled on. i hope you get what i am trying to say. think of the "end date" as the end of one thing and also the beginning of the next. there really is no end to this journey. ok, my book is done! lol
Hey everybody! I really appreciate you taking the time to read such a long post and add your thoughtful comments. Thank you.
Christy, all I can say is...as of now YOU are the lead kicker on my kick ball team. You are the bomb kid.
I think focusing on the journey is where it's at. Because the journey is everything, in all parts of life, not just weight loss. The changes we are seeing in ourselves and each other are much more mental than physical I think. I mean, when you read through the blogs, we are more about the mental challenge than the physical one. And seeing results is rewarding, yes, but living with the positive mental change is much much more rewarding than any picture. I feel like a different person since I started this only a few short weeks ago, and certainly since the beginning of the group shred, and I have been happy to see results in my pictures (in fact, it was my #1 goal in the beginning), but now looking back, I really appreciate so many other things much more. My physical pictures have changed much less than the mental picture I have of myself because of this shred and this group. So I think you shouldn't dread the pictures. Just think of it as taking a picture of your mindset not your body. Like how you like your before picture because you know you were happy in it. Focus on that and you will come to enjoy it hopefully. You're doing great!
-JP
Hey Christy, you don't know me at all, but I am on another forum with a couple of ladies here who are both doing incredibly well on the shredder council. I had started doing the Metabolic Surge program and they let me know about Adam Waters' site, so I decided to check it out...and to check out some of you shredders.
I just want you to know that you shouldn't worry about what Adam has in mind after this challenge. I'd be on your team any day of the week....you really are amazing not to mention someone to look up to and be inspired by (and I haven't even finished reading!!!)
I think it's great how you are acknowledging, working through and then accepting your feelings. A huge component of getting where you want to be is mental...you seem to be kicking butt in that department, and it IS showing in your pictures as well!
Keep up the good work!
Rita
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